Joke. Dork. Failure.

1) Show Mom pictures of the snow last night (UGUISE! SNOW!)
2) Fill out really reduntantly long forms for new dentist.
3) Go over new YES content for tomorrow (I'm so screwed if I end up having to facilitate).
4) Go to the bathroom.
5) Catch up on LJ, Facebook and YAD.
6) Get a nosebleed (that's been my favorite so far).
7) Not eat lunch at Pappasito's, since not in Houston. (We'll see how long I can hold out...I have a few more goldfish).
8) Repack toiletries into approved quart sized bag. Mine was the right size, but falling apart.
9) Work on Mom's Christmas present.
10) Wish I had told my manager I needed Friday for travel.
11) Wonder how long to wait before calling in for tomorrow.

Had I known...I would have just one-wayed a car and driven to Houston. Harumph.

I'm sitting at Sandtrap, staring out at the course, trying to find all I can about London on my trusty SKII. I cannot comprehend the mentality behind blowing people up. I just don't get it. I don't understand hate. I don't understand believing in something so vehemently that you would kill someone else because the didn't believe. I don't unerstand killing innocents in the name of (any) religion. Maybe I'm sheltered. I don't know. I think schocolate is the only current Londoner on my flist...I hope everyone is doing well.

I was going to post some frivolity re: BSG, HP, the Dancing with the Stars finale, and www.oceanic-air.com's crawsomeness, but I think I'll leave it for later.

Kicks VCR. Hard. I programmed you right and everything you piece of crap.

Seriously, anyone?

That's it. I'm getting a TiVo.

OMG, I'm that old lady who can't stop the 12:00 from flashing.

Meh. My step-mom's mom died this morning (news to me that she'd been sick(er)). And since the funeral will probably be next week, my dad basically said don't bother trying to come. I'm not sure how to feel about that. All I know is I have a letter in my backpack that I wrote about a month ago that I never sent to her.

And to make matters worse, I'm stuck on stupid overnights at work. I just want a vacation.

Well, I haven't updated in a while (minus the rant) because RL is getting in the way. And I've just not had the heart to write or post or do anything but sit in front of the TV. I still hate my job, Matt and Juan are still together, but seperated by about 75 miles. I don't know. Things are just wonky and I don't know how to de-wonk-ify. Blech. RL sucks.

I don't normally write super-personal entries in here, always afraid that someone I know from RL will find it, and in so doing, find me out. But I have to get some things off my chest. I think I use the internet, LJ, HP, SW, fanfic, as an escape from RL. I'm not sure why. My life, apart from having no money and a job I'm not really fond of, isn't really that bad. I have a nice home with a great roommate, I have my health, most everything is alright for me. So why the need to escape?

~~~

Last night, my roommate's boyfriend, Juan, came home from drinking and tried to kill himself. He's an alcoholic, on probation for DUI. They broke up the first time b/c Juan cheated on Matt with one of his managers. When they got back together, Mat knew that he was unstable, he had been drinking (A LOT), but Juan said he had changed. And, I guess he has, sort of, but he's still going to break Matt in two when the inevitable happens. Matt's been talking about wedding rings and I've been agreeing, even though I think it's a big mistake.

~~~

I don't know. I guess, I just need a place where I can be myself. Where I can talk to people that know me, but don't really. I know I have friends here, and that's comforting somehow. You guys love me even though we've never met, even though I don't know what you look like, even though you don't know my last name. I don't know...I just need some hugs.

Kisses, Kel

Well, Thanksgiving gumbo was fine. I felt as bad yesterday as I had the whole week, so I'm actually glad it was a no fuss (for me) dinner. It was really good, too. Sausage & chicken. I think I'm just upset by not being with family. Whatever. I'm going to make green bean casserole tomorrow, so all will be right with the world.

So...I'm feeling a little better this morning, but I didn't sleep very well last night. I think I finally fell asleep at 5:30, but I still woke up at the regular time.

But I'm watching SNL and Stuart Smalley comes on and starts talking about how his movie bombed. This is a GREAT sketch. He pulls out a bag of Chessmen cookies and says:

"These are Chessmen, I like to eat them but you can shove them up your ass."

Mwahahahahahahahahahaha. That's exactly how I feel right now. Leave it to Stuart to make me laugh.

...if I'm attracted to another gay man. Let me preface that (although, I really can't do that, can I?) by saying, I'm only attracted to gay men. The last 3 men I've been attracted to turned out to be gay. Alas, living in Orlando, the odds are much higher. Boy A, Boy B and Boy C...and now, I'm wondering if Boy D is as well. I guess I should just ask, but I hate doing that. Another potential issue, he's a lot younger. Eh, I like them young anyway. ;)

Edited to protect me from the innocent (okay, the guilty).