I'm still flying. [That's not much.] It's enough.

I'm "happy" to report that I'm doing much better than my last post. I'm finally getting over my cold. I'm still exhausted emotionally, physically, and mentally.

Thank God for good friends with cool heads. I had lunch with Alex on Monday. She told me many, many things. All of which I needed to hear. Most especially, that it's not my fault. I went to KSC with starsfell on Tuesday, and she, of course, soothes my soul in a way I can't describe. [WHO SAYS BEING A GQMF DOESN'T HAVE IT'S PERKS?]

I'm now looking forward to living alone. Buying a ridiculous amount of home goods from IKEA. And many other things (not the least of which, running the dishwasher when I want).

I'm not looking forward to packing. Finding eight years of belongings in mingled places. Of finding an apartment. Of moving. Of being alone.

Yes, I know I'm not alone.

I'm still very upset. But not at having to move. I'm upset at losing my best friend, even though we still live in the same house.

I know I will be okay. I know a lot of things can happen in a year. It still doesn't really feel like it right now.

YOU CAN ALWAYS COUNT ON MOM.

I just got off the phone with my mom. I had debated telling her about having to move. She'll be here on the First and I didn't want the news to be a downer for her trip. But, we were chatting on FB and I just wanted her love. So, I told her. And we talked for almost an hour. And I think I convinced her not to fly to Florida for the express purpose of twisting Matt's head off. (She actually asked if I wanted her and Mary not to come...totally preposterous. I NEED AN ADULT.)

It is what it is. She knows. I feel "better."

I've taken a melatonin and some nyquil...Will and Jack and Elizabeth will be seeing me off to bed.